Dr. Hounchell's Theory of Life and Everything: Cats

Today's Topic is cats:

Cats are sure cute. And they are sure they are cute. 

But did you know that they only meow ( according to scientists ) do they can communicate with us. 

Now, this is not much unlike babies. Babies only cry to communicate with us ( I apologize to all babies who can read this ). 

What if though, cats are jst people who were turned into cats by evil wizards who work in pet shops. Wait! This might be the plot of he move Nine Lives...

Oops, sorry, I can't teach you anything. I guess. 

Original Sentences: About Drem Eater

1. Drems can't feel free, because fear is like oranges, it isn't good for elevator matinees.

2. Drems can dream but they only dream of smells, but only smells of rustic diners from the futureland.

3. Dreams have feathers, scales, and two beaks that they keep as keepsakes for the forsaken.

4. Why can't a drem look directly at the moon?

5. When six drems stand in a triangle, they still look like teeny rectangles.

My Friend Free Asked Me to Make a List of My Favorite Colors

1. Flamingo color
2. Electric pikachu yellow
3. Red delicious red
4. Very berry purple
5. Blue raspberry blue
6. Hulk green
7. Eternal night black
8. Dusty traffic cone orange
9. Non dusty traffic cone orange
10. The color of glow in the dark stuff, when it isn't glowing color

Mayo of Chistmas Tahown

I am Mayo of Christmas Tahown
I make sure no Chittlrens frown
I wrap my presence with French toast
Make sure it is sweeter than most
I put on my candy mane
Become I'm a lion, I don't need to explain
Lion of Christmas
Check your list
And check it twice
Make sure whose garlic knotty and rice
You must be peanut better
Or steamed nice
On the back of a gingersnap
I go into the night
Give bugahs my presence
With holiday cake presents
Cake in on
Strong like a cruton
Salad and salude
Glad you stopped right
I'm off to make less burgahs frown

Poetic Review of Nightmare Before Christmas

Nightmare Before Christmas Time
Halloween troupes and holidays contrived
Talking skull and Sandy claws
Confused message, just because
Classic holiday
Trapped in a snowy daze
The music and soundtrack
Perhaps the only things I won't attack
The animation is stop and go
But it always has something to show
Popping color and other things
Screw this is Halloween is something I have to sing
What is in Thanksgiving Town
What is in the entire forest
Really where is that and where is this
It is short and fun
Good for Christmas or anyone
I can't complain
Or explain
But who cares
Four out of five death stares

Prime Time For Crime: Fresh Salad

Want to make an easy three trillion billion dollars?

This is how we do it. We create something people probably don't need, but will think that they need.

For example, people like salad. People think salad is never fresh. Well, open up a garden, but for salad. They can pay ex amount of money to pick incidents for a salad they can make on site.

Brand it correctly and you have won. Won life.

Poetic Movie Review of Free Bird

What is there to say?
Some corporate executive said
Let's make a thanksgiving flick
And some other people said OKAY
The movie will be about a bird
A time traveling bird, in case you wondered
Leading a bunch of maniacs
To his time machine in the past
The movie has hardly a redeeming quality
Besides being the one Thanksgiving children's movie
The time travel doesn't make sense
It's hard to see its angle, because it stays in the fence
The characters aren't likable or fun
It's mostly a revenge flick and then its done
Almost like the movie Chicken Run
Your typical plot
Done without a thought
We will kill you turkeys
Oops now they have weapons they might hurt me
To say the least
It is a preamble to a thanksgiving feast
And as bad as it might be
I stand by the movie being worth a see
For as bad as it is
It stuck with me just because
Negative three stars out of positive five
Because some movies are better dead than alive

Dr. Hounchell's Theory of Life and Everything: Clocks

 Today's Topic is Clocks. Clocks are designed specifically to get you in trouble.

Time is 100% arbitrary. Some of us have set are clocks forwards specifically to be early for everything.

I could say, lets meet at 1:12 but on the living room clock. The living room clock could say 1:11 but the entire universe may think it is 3:56.

Clocks are instead designed to be infinitely tonight to cause trouble. School time and work time are never correct or the same. They are always off by a million seconds or something.

Don't worry about it, our time will come.

Wacky Wednesday: Reward System

This concept is an invention to help people stay focused and attempt to avoid procrastination.

You put your credit card into a website, and it reminds you every 30 minutes about your deadline, and if you ignore it, they automatically pull $1 from your account.

Once you finish, you !just submit proof that you did indeed finish. Procrastination will cost you.

ORIGINAL Sentences about eggs

1. Water Leon on the hill, is actually a spider egg set of stilts.

2. Aslan is a lie... on egging a set of broken shells.

3. Crack an egg, and you will find, one in third million has a gold coin.

4. Eggs rolling away from an iron skillet, because who wouldn't.

5. Drems never eat eggs, because eggs are too much like rocks filled with strange slime.

Mayo of Burgah Tahown in the Union underground

I am the Mayo of Burgah Tahown
I make sure the Burgahs never frown
I keep everything together
Make sure we're Burgah and we're not feather
Toasty toasty in the sun
Book end by two Hawaiian buns
Sesame seeds and ketchup fleas
Which one is which? Just some flavor please
Quarter half and full
I'm the Mayo, so I have some pull
A Jalapeño popper named Jeremy
I wanted to help him believe me
I offered him a silver dollar
He used it to be his hotdog a collar.

Poetic Review of Toy Story

A toy like any other
Life interested by his space brother
Sure, I an you an arm, or even a hand
But look, Randy Newman isn't a band
We need to go find Andy
Our lives are looking dandy
Let's keep an open bind
Well, were screwed, we've been left behind
Fire fire and now we fly
We are friends high in the sky
CGI you can look good
Every movie should
4.7 out of five
Because ive got good memories of the behive

This Puzzle Represents my Life

When I worked with kids, I put this puzzle together. It was missing only one piece. Rather than being part of the sky, fence, or ground, it is a piece of Hello Kitty.

It is actually the part of Hello Kitty that makes her easy to identify. It is the part of her mind that has the bow. Without the bow, this picture can technically be of anything.

In that regard, I am mostly complete too, and definitely everything around me is complete. I just have a part of me that is not missing. It can just be anything. That space is my motivation, and it is my strength.

This picture is me.

Lazy Businessman Pants Idea

Know how jeans and slacks are super uncomfortable? Of course you do, you are probably human.

What if on the inside, instead of the same material, we just use pajama pants material. Easy invention. Easy millionaire.

Prime Time for Water Bottle Crime

Want to make quick money? Do you wish that it would fall from the sky? Wish money was like water and water was like gold? Well, you've come to the right criminal.

Water fountains are free, and typically hey are filled with cool water. This is what we call a fact.

Believe it or not, some events give bottles of water and waer bottles away for free! Free! Free! This is another fact as well.

Well, scratch that darn high school logo off of the water bottle. Now, using adhesive that you can "permanently" borrow from an office, police station, or person walking by, affix your own logo.

Now, sell these water bottles for $1 in front of water fountains. It's like water is money.

Want to earn the money twice as fast? Double the price. $2.

Original Sentences Again

1. Time can fly from one end of the counter to the other, but if a fly tries it, it's the end of his time.

2. A fly has half of a mind to always be nearby, but it only has part of a mind.

3. Flies organize a flyby to kill all of the caterpillars nd birds that are giving them a hard time.

4. Around the cosmic cube of time, flies a witch on a broom full of pretzel sticks.

5. Smells like a smell can always feel like a feeling, because it s a site to see.

Poetic Review of Frozen

When told to let it go
Then Elsa will truly show
That it's always time for snow
It is questionable
Whether she is the hero or villain
Sure, she's the main
Sure, she seems good
Anyone in a Disney movie, probably would
The soundtrack is breath taking
The plot risk taking
But there's no mistaking
This movie show get a rather high rating
4.9 stars out of 5
Because Ive get a heart and a mind

Dr. Hounchell's Theory of Life and Everything: Darkness

Today's Topic Darkness:

Dr. Hounchell has always been here for you. And I am ready to explain that darkness is a ploy. Darkness has been a ploy for longer than ever. The concept of ever.

Darkness is a way to keep you indoors. The magic illumaniti gophers don't want you to notice their practices. They are continually trying to summon their demon overlords to take over the government.

Not "the government" per say, but the local government inside of the closest elementary school. They shift the minds of those itty bitty chickens and they intended on you never knowing.

Look closely in the darkness and you will see them.

Just look. You can see.

Five More Original Sentences about Drems

1. If you add water to powdered Drems, you can stir it into chocolate milk, but if you stir to long, it will turn into a sardine can.

2. A Drem once had an hour glass, but only for 59 minutes, then it was just a minute glass.

3. If a Drem looks to closely at a screen door, it will turn into a crow that hates wizards and cheese.

4. In the past, people thought Drems weren't real, people still don't think they are real, but some people don't know anything yet.

5. Don't touch an over with a 1987 copy of any Gameboy game when a Drem is nearby, because that is how Dreams are created.

Poetic Review of Dr. Strange

The Doctor is in
And he brought magic friends
he's got a cloak
That'll help him not choke
He's always right
And he's never Wong
But Wong is there
To listen to a Beyonce song
I never noticed how impactful music is
If we don't count Jaws on the list
If you are locked in a vault
An can't find your way out
Astral project to see what this movie is about
Watch Benedict slowly become strange
Prove once and for all, that he has magical range
This movie Ragnorcked the house
Even if Dr. Strange's accent was Dr. House
If you are human
See this movie once and again
Four out of Five stars

Dr. Hounchell's Theory of Life and Everything: Cheese

Today's Topic is cheese.

Cheese is strange, to the point that it keeps coming up in my life. Do you want cheese on that? Yes, obviously.

But what is cheese? Is a yellow block of salty milk? That's when i began to wonder if aliens have been using cheese like a salt lick for people like we use salt licks for deer. And if such a thing is possible... are they hunting us?

I don't know, but cheese is delicious! And it definitely isn't beig used to capture human people. I am Dr. Hounchell, every than will be okay.

Original Sentences: About Frogs

1. Perhaps, he knew not that he was a frog, but he must've known he was not a hog.

2. Froggy Froggyson drove a Honda, what a small car for a small thing.

3. What small hands Froggy Froggyson had, making it easy to play XBox 360 and eat sunflower seeds.

4. The curse of 10,000 frogs, on 10,000 logs, was short one frog, and long one log, because of Froggy Froggyson.

5. Ancient Egyptian covered in metallic blue paint and cream cheese from long long ago, what do you make of Froggy Froggyson?

6. He is thins or he is that, but never what you least expect, for when the world is under attack, Froggy Froggyson is your suspect.

Writing Extratime: an excercise

This exercise is deceptively difficult. Give yourself 60 seconds or even less, now describe all of the important aspects of your story.

Now, subtract 10 seconds, and do it again.

Subtract it until you have 10 seconds left. Now, you have the core of your tale. The thing you can tell anyone. Or you Have an extremely fast voice. Win win either way.

Crazy Concept Monday: Poem

I could feel the world shift
First leaning right, then leaning left
Sounding like thunder
But nothing was there
My cats were staring at the ceiling
But even it was bare
I began to wonder
And even to fret
Had my world been reset
Nothing felt right
Nothing felt true
What was once down was now blue
Amongst the hidden
In the darkened sky
I covered my face, and covered the lies
Because outside was no different
Who was I?

The Everything Glasses: Invention

We have glasses for everything. To see in the dark, to see under water, to see in the light, to see the concept of sleep, and even just to plain old see.

What about instead of all of these different kinds of glasses, we just make a single kind of frame. Then have interchangeable lenses. The underwater ones would Be like columns that touched beside your eyes. The sunglasses ones would be tinted Obviously. There sleep ones would be soft. 

I know it will never work, because it wouldn't make more money, but i cam dream. Copywrite me, obviously.

Poetic Review of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2

Some thing tells me
that some of this movie
was clearly designed to be
A ride for Universal Studios
But Who knows?

I cannot lie though
The ending is spectacular
It has amazing effects
With a slight twist, you may not expect
A sword inside a hat
Light color, and magic

The movie is ruined on a little
By the ending that is a future riddle
Beyond that it ties up lose ends
Ending the Dead Parent winds

Finally after seven books
And an 8 movie outlook
We can end this Harry Potter nonsense
What? There's a play?
That makes sense

This movies make money
Why wouldn't they make more
4 out of 5 stars

Poetic Review of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part One

At one time they were kids
But that seems over in this movie and the next
What was once a story about wizards and witches
Now its about some people crawling through ditches
Living in the woods
Looking for a cloak, a wand, and something else
So, they can destroy Lord Voldemort
Feel as thought your heart has regrown
After watching the end of Half-Blood Prince on your own
Prepare for the final scene of this
To leave you similarly happy-less
The Deathly Hallow story of the past
Shows us a story of the Invisibility cloak at last
See how brothers dealt with death
And crossed a bridge
It is much more interesting than I'm willing to admit
And the logo looks like an illuminati remnant
So watch it
Because it's a movie that got split
4 out 5 stars

Poetic Review of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

H

Perhaps I remember this one the least
When the Weasley's house burned down during a feast
It might be because it runs along
The same Order of the Phoenix song
That being said, this had the highest emotion
If it literally has the least motion
We learn more about History
And what went on before
Tom Riddle became Lord Voldemort
This plot heavy
And that is good
If you see any of them, this the one you should
It also has some romance
In the form of a kiss
As always, the actors look like they are twenty
When they are suppose to be in their teens
Also if you want to cry
Watch to the end for a character to die
3.5 out of 5 stars
My horocrux replaced my heart

Poetic Review of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoneix

Okay, so there is a family tree
Some building between two buildings
The longest book in the series gets cut into one film
Harry's scar gets wifi to Voldemort
Creating the flashback subplot
Who would've thought?
Umbridge who is a bridge
Between looking like a bake sale mom
And someone who will cut your heart
End everything with a wizard stand off
They cute so much from this
It is hardly the same
I guess if Harry is in it
Then whose gonna throw a fit
I am looking you Cursed Child
Am I the only one that thinks these movies are moderate to mild
Whatever, the actors are getting super old
And so are the rules of this weird weird world
3 out of five
Because I speak my mind

Poetic Review of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

The Goblet of Fire
The tri-ward tournament
Let's all sit back and element
And get our Drag-ON
There's a death of Edward Cullen
But this movie is the one to build upon
Three wizard schools?
The world building is so cool
Underwater
In the sky
And on the ground
This series has literally no bounds
No man villain has a personal face
Even if it is misplaced
Harry's parents can't come back from the dead
Don't scowl at me, that's what Dumbledor said
Getting kind of old, cast
But meh, it will get worse at the last
The exterior shots are all amazing
9 out of ten
Not liking this movie is a sin