Friday, February 5, 2016

Ax D Evil the Quest-Ion

The Devil seemed pretty serious, and despite the fact that you had heard plenty of bad things about the Devil, she had never actually done anything bad to you. You were the kind of person that judged others based on how they treated you, so who exactly were you to say no to someone who never wronged you.
            “K,” you said confidently. You pricked your finger, and you signed the contract.
            “You are about to be a star!” A blinding white light consumed your soul, and you could feel your bodiless essence being pulled through the floor. As you passed through the bottom of the floor, you watched as a bright red horned soul pass by. That soul smashed into your body, and then you were gone.
            You passed through the hundreds of layers of ground until finally you started to sink into an orange and red cavern filled with lava and fire. This must have been Hell. An iron clasped wrapped around your leg, and a pickaxe formed in your hand. There was a nine foot tall demon with a whip standing in front of you.
            “Mine or die!” He screamed. You lifted the pickaxe, bit was wrapped in barbed wire and extremely heavy. Once you finally got it raised, you swung it at a nearby rock, causing the rock to scream and bled out small rubies.
            “I’m not already dead,” you said. You swung at the screaming rock, and it began to bleed even larger rubies.
            “You wish you were dead.” So, you continued to swing your pickaxe at the screaming rock. Your hands became bloody themselves because the barbed wire cut your skin every time the pickaxe made contact with the rock. Time didn’t seem to flow naturally, and you weren’t even sure how long you had been in Hell. Once there was a pile of blood rubies, a small demon with a sack made of human flesh came by and collected them wordlessly. “30 second break time,” the demon screamed. He tossed you a bottle of what you could only describe as salt water or sweat. You drank it and sat near the rock, not really carrying what the liquid was.
            “Pssst! Hey pickaxe swingin’ bloody hands,” someone said. You looked around, but you didn’t see anyone but the huge demon. “Stupid. Look down here.” You glanced down, and you saw that the ruby rock had a face formed into it. It didn’t really look like a human face, more like a cat’s face. “Behind me is an ax guitar. If you grab it, you can kill the demon, and you can get out of here. If you do, you have to come back for me.”
            You weren’t exactly sure why the screaming rock was helping you, but as you peaked around the edge of the rock, you saw the ax guitar on the other side of the rock. “Break time is over!” The demon whipped you, and you continued to hit the screaming rock with your pickaxe, causing it to bleed rubies. You were waiting for just the right moment to spring forward and grab the guitar, but the hard end of the whip was intimidating you. If the demon hit you with that whip, you were afraid that it would easily kill you.
            With a sudden plan biting you in the butt, you swung the pickaxe as hard as you possible could, causing the rock to scream louder than it ever had. Then you acted as though the pickaxe was stuck in the rock. “What in the Hell is going on?” The demon yelled.
            “The pickaxe is stuck,” you said. The demon moved over and put the whip on his belt. As he reached over to grab the pickaxe, you grabbed the ax guitar and swung it down hard on the demon. Instead of killing him, as you were initially told by the rock, it just dazed the demon for a mere second. He grabbed the guitar and slung it into the distance.
            “That wasn’t a good idea,” the demon grabbed you by the throat and crushed you into a similar rock to the one you were hitting with the pickaxe.
            “You were supposed to play the guitar? What made you think to hit him?”

            “It just seemed to be the right thing to do like I had heard about it from someone else,” you said. Now, you were doomed to be a rock in hell. You should have just played that ax guitar rather than trying to beat a demon senseless with it.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Poetic Movie Review of The Proposal

 There are three types of RomComs There's the ones that are corny The kind that are raunch and porn-y Then there's ones filled with ...