Poem: Cold

It's so cold
I'm feeling old
My joints are worn
My jacket is torn
Skin blistered and red
Flakey feeling dead
It's negative six degrees
Turn up the heat please
I'm going to turn to ice
It won't be nice
I'm cold and blue
Can't wear sandals, need shoes
Finger tips are hard
Can't play my lute like a bard
Tongue stuck in place
Inside my face
Freezing and mellow
Lest there isn't snow that yellow

Dr. Hounchell's Theory of Life and Everything: Airports

Today's topic is air ports.

Air ports suck. There weirdly lit and they suck. Why though?

Air ports are made of people wandering around Germs! Air ports are just places that have germs everywhere. And electricity! I'm not going to feel good with my phone charging! It's too much like a prison had a baby with a hospital.

Yeah...

A haiku: Good News

Tomorrow I move 

Out of my old apartment

And into a house

Writing Excercise: Rhyme Time

Write an entire short story in which everything rhymes. Do it in couplets. Do it randomly, but make the rhymes apparent.

Why?

Well, for one it's a challenge.
For two, it forces you to reach deep into your vocabulary. Heck, it might even force you to look up new words.

It's a win. Win. Win.

Roses: A Poem

Roses are red
The color we bled
Pluck them from their roots
Their stories, their books
Pluck them for their good looks

It's a flower
Every hour
Till its dead in the dirt
Go ahead, pluck one
I'm sure it won't hurt

Plus the rose
That arose
Pluck the daisy
In the mist, so hazy
Pluck the mushroom
In the panic room
Pluck the roses red
From the graves of the dead

The flower represents
Time's stream, consent
Scream your resent
Because you invention went unsent

Welcome to Heaven
And welcome to hell
Go ahead, pick the flowers
They'll regrow
If you couldn't retell

Crime Stops Snow

Stealy tips #3: Snow

Snow is evil. Snow is good.

Why though? Because snow allows for you to see what's been touched, which vehicles, which houses. It allows for you to vanish. It's cold and no one else has the guts.

However, it does the same for others. They'll know you're there. They will see you. They will see your steps.

The important thing is not to be caught. Never get caught.

Invention: Wrap Rap

Want a million dollar idea?

This is an automatic wrapping machine that raps rap versions of Christmas songs.

Why does this need to exist?

Don't ask me, you made it. Why does a singing bass on a wall mount exist? Yeah. I went there.